Friday, April 30, 2010

~falling in love and other risky behaviors

I was watching a documentary last night called Second Skin. It was about the online gaming communities. One of the story lines followed a couple that met through a game and fell in love over the computer. They eventually made the big move and he transplanted himself across the country to be with her. I wasn't able to finish the movie, but where I left it, you could see that the rose colored glasses were off and things were falling apart for them. It all got me thinking about how incredibly blessed and lucky Rob and I were. Seeing the interviews from before they met face to face was hilarious and so mirrored what we experienced. Giddy, full of hope, and totally scared to death but willing to take that leap. I am still amazed at the level of support my family showed when I made the big "i met someone online and I think I'm in love" confession. To this day I can't imagine the conversation mom and dad must have had that night. But it wasn't like it was my first venture into meeting people online. Not like I'd dated many folks from the magic toaster, but I'd had enough online exchanges and witnessed enough train wreck relationships to know better. I was cautious enough to know what was real and what was fantasy. Waiting for that first visit was gloriously scary. The odd thing is, the only thing my friends kept worrying over was what if he smelled bad. A thought I had never contemplated, the idea of a guy with really bad BO terrified my friends. Not "what if he's a woman? or a junky? or married? or mean?" To this day, I am still blown away that our leap of faith was met with so many blessings. With the success of so many Eharmony couples, admitting you met online is a little less freakish now a days. You still get that raised eyebrow "oh reallllly?" look, but fewer people think of you as some desperate kitten poster hanging freak show. On our honeymoon, we visited a friend of mine that I knew from the Kynd Crafter circle. She had recently fallen in love online but was embarrassed to admit it. I laugh when I think that she was embarrassed to admit to me that she had met her soul mate at the same silly site I had. In our circle of friends, I can name several very successful marriages that came about from a similar leap of faith. I wonder, what will B think of her parents' love story some day? Will it be so common place that she doesn't blink an eye? So I'd like to take this moment to thank my folks for being so kind as to keep their fears and doubts to themselves when I poured my heart out. I'd like to thank my dear friend Jessica for enduring a year of me dating him long distance and being a giddy school girl when our friendship was built upon our independent spirits and being survivors. I don't know what I would have done without gin therapy nights at the monkey pub and making weird eye Willy our whipping boy or our Snow Goose nights with Cheryl and Lisa singing Fat Bottom Girls. I'd like to thank the moms that I nannied for during that time of change for their support and understanding and embracing of Rob made me feel even safer in my decision to leave the work I loved to start from scratch. The years prior to Rob were some of the greatest in my life and I would never trade a single one of them for anything. After college, I felt beat down and unsure who I was anymore. Those years in Seattle allowed me to regroup and feel good about who I was once again. I knew what I wanted and what I was not willing to take. I have no doubt that if I didn't have that foundation already laid out, the leap into Rob's arms would have been much much bumpier.

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