Friday, November 7, 2008

~little feet i ache to nuzzle

Sometimes it's hard to accept there really is a child inside. We tried for so long. At times it seems so surreal, that I start wondering if I'm making it all up. Like one of those crazy women on soap operas that stuff pillows up their shirts. But then I remember that we've got photo evidence that I'm not losing my mind. This little foot.... it makes things so much more concrete for me. I can look at this stubborn little foot and I swear, I can almost feel the soft cool arch on my lips.

We spent so much time praying that the latest combination would do the trick. All those monthes where we were ready to throw in the towel. And then, once those 5 little pee sticks revealed an answer to our prayers, I spent so much time feeling nauseous and queasy. This odd phase of nothingness tricks me. Though I truly believe that lil' foot did a happy little Irish jig on the side of my stomach as the electoral votes rolled in on Tuesday. I think the little one knew I needed some reassurance that we didn't have a teeny Alex P. Keaton on our hands. For they flashed us the tell tale sign of any mini revolutionary.... we got the peace sign.

Hey little one..... I want you to know you are coming into a world full of possibility. I want you to know that you are coming into a brand new age. The season has turned and, even though the newsman just told us the first snow of the year is falling, I see your future blossoming with chances. None of it comes easy. But you have the two of us, hands ready in case you need steadying. You are a child of possibility. We all are.... no matter our age. And I want you to know that your very existence gives others hope. Others who don't even know you.... most barely even know me but are drawn to tell me how you touched them. Just knowing the journey it took for you to find us, is a light to those still wandering down that dark path just before the dawn. I hope your teensy little dreams in there are blessed and warm and give you peace.

1 comment:

  1. beautiful. i have no doubt that any child raised by you two will make a difference somehow. God bless the three of you!